The Brands: A week...

Wednesday, June 30, 2010

A week...

It's a week since we learned officially about Caleb's leukemia. I'm still very much adjusting to using words like cancer and leukemia to describe our family and my son. So much has happened in such a short short time. We have a lot of thanksgiving and a lot of heartache as we sort out our new normal. We ache because our reality, Caleb's hurting body, cannot be just taken away. We know this is something we must endure. There will be more bad times to come. We can pray that this suffering be taken away, but that is not to be. This leukemia can be beaten, eliminated, but there is much suffering to travel through before we can get there. I just wish that I could take the suffering for him. It reminds me very much of a loving Father who wanted so much to take the long-suffering from his children that he took the suffering himself. I feel that pain. Anyone watching their child suffer in any way can understand this pain. I've heard parents talking this way in the halls here. The suffering of chemo will be great, but the result and work of chemo is to eliminate the greater sickness, leukemia.

I met with a pharmacist today and learned about the various medecines that Caleb will be taking, and the side effects of the medications, and the medecines used to control the side effects. Fortunately they give all of the information in print as well. I appreciate that. Reality is slowly setting in, particularly as we get further into treatment. Caleb may lose his hair within two weeks. Time for summer haircuts in the Brand house! Hopefully we'll get both Dad and Caleb's hair cut this weekend.

Caleb is struggling with leg pain tonight. It aches me to see him ache. It's waking him up from sleep, and we've given him some medecine (again!) to relieve the pain. I just turned on the TV, yes, at midnight, to distract him from the pain until hopefully the pain medication kicks in. Backyardigans to the rescue. I hope. I'm going to keep this blog post short because I need to give him my attention. When I started posting, he was sleeping peacefully, but not so anymore.

Please keep praying. And if you get this right now, pray that his legs stop hurting him.
Thanks for your care for us.
J

Grandpa reads Curious George to Caleb.

3 comments:

Gina Taylor said...: Jess and Tim: I just read this post. I am praying that Caleb remains as pain free as possible. Thank you for posting the picture of your dad and Caleb. I am can barely look at it without thinking of your mother Jess. She was one brave lady and her bravery lives within you too Jess. I know it does. God bless you all.
Love, Gina; July 1, 2010 at 9:52 AM
d said...: I love seeing Tigger listening with Caleb to the story. Jess, the words from your heart bring tears to my eyes. It is good to hear your thoughts, prompting us to pray in specific ways.

I wish I could take the pain away for this journey.

your sis,
spot; July 1, 2010 at 11:07 AM
Justin said...: Hey Jess and Tim,
thanks for sharing your story with us. Its a blessing to be able to hear what's going on and to be able to pray with you and for you. Kristin says she's looking forward to Caleb coming home so she can visit.
rachel, justin, kristin, alyssa, and joel; July 1, 2010 at 5:36 PM

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What is ALL?

Caleb has ALL, a form of leukemia. From what I understand (here's the dummy's guide to leukemia), leukemia means that something has gone wrong in blood cell production.

Blood is made up of 3 main parts, red blood cells, white blood cells, and platelets. The red blood cells do things like carry oxygen and nutrients through your body. The white blood cells fight infections and keep you healthy. The platelets glue it all together. (I did say this was the dummy's guide, remember.) Bone marrow is where these cells are made and released into the blood stream.

In Caleb's leukemia, his bone marrow is producing the 3 kinds of cells, but some of the white blood cells are being made wrong. These white blood cells are not maturing, they don't perform any function, and they aren't dying off. They take up space, and made it so that Caleb's red blood cells, functioning white cells, and platelets were having a hard time doing their jobs, and the production of the blasts was taking over. This is why before we were admitted to the hospital, Caleb was tired and pale. His blood just wasn't able to do what it should do.

Chemo treatments are designed to kill back the blasts. The only way to do this has a lot of extra damage (collateral damage) as well, which we see in side effects like hair loss and need for blood transfusions. Because chemo also knocks back regular blood cells, Caleb needs blood and platelet transfusions to replace what is being lost through treatment. White blood cells cannot be transfused, which is why he has nothing to fight off infections. We can't replace those ones. When the drugs are less intense and his body can gradually go back to doing what it should be doing, white blood cell production should return. We will have to be careful for a long time, though.

Hair loss occurs because cells that are replaced often in our body, like hair, can't keep up production. The cells die off faster than they are replaced. Other fast growing/often replaced cells are in our mouths and our nails. These are all affected.

I hope my dummy's guide to leukemia makes sense. It's the way I currently understand things. People in the health care profession may cringe at my descriptions, but hopefully it's accurate enough to explain what Caleb's going through. Maybe it will help you explain it to your kids. For now, we just say we're blasting blasts.

We are the Brands

We are three kids, two parents, and one dog. And too many fish. We love our city, time in the outdoors, playing soccer, camping, and making music. Our faith is central to our lives.

On June 23, pieces of what had previously been a concerning question about our son Caleb's health came together in a diagnosis of leukemia. It all happened rather quickly, after bringing him to the ER at McMaster hospital on Monday, June 21. We're absorbing this news, and trying to learn how to cope with leukemia and a young family. Our hearts are torn, but we feel the love of many.

This blog is intended to share with our loved ones and their loved ones what is happening for Caleb and the rest of us. I must say that it is possibly as much information-giving as it is therapeutic writing. Thank you for taking the time to share with us our experience. We find strength in numbers, and in shared experiences.